Valentine´s Day
DemonSpawn
Date:
14/02/2005
Here's some advice on the best way to
celebrate Valentine's Day with your loved one: don't.
You have to realise that by becoming
sucked into this thing is asking to be sent to a special kind of
hell. The place they reserve for child molesters and woman drivers. I
mean, it's a concept that is guaranteed to fuck up any relationship
that isn't rock-solid, and make even the most optimistic single
person become a cynical and jaded shadow of their former selves. Or
at least, that's what happened to Coolmac. Ha ha.
Really, though, all it is, is a
consumer-fest. It's not good to encourage those sorts of things,
because every year, advertising gets more competitive, gifts get more
expensive, and the music gets cheesier, until you end up with another
holiday like Christmas. And when there's money to be made, people
will go to any lengths to make it. Things get messy and homeless
children, animals, and the environment end up with the short stick.
As you may have noticed, I have
reserved a special place in the darker section of my heart for
Valentine's Day. I am of the opinion that it gives anyone but the
most devoted lover a way out. It blatantly encourages people to
reserve their romantic plans for one day in the year. And Sod almost
always steps in and fucks everything up. This leads to disappointment
and the promise that next year will be better. But it never is.
Along the same lines, there is always
the cop-out that comes with this date. I've heard various sorry
assholes claim that they deserve the love of their respective
partners because they “spoiled her on Valentine's Day,” which
makes me want to crunch bricks between my teeth. What the fuck is
wrong with the other three hundred and sixty three days in the year,
anyway?
It just drives me insane! Does anyone
stop to wonder what dear old shit-stirrer himself, Valentine, may
think of this? Consider for a moment that his love, that was worth
hanging himself in a prison cell for, has become a money-making
scheme, suggesting romance to be worth celebrating for only one day
each year. How little we value the one thing which should be
considered priceless.
So, to all you love-struck fools out
there, next time you go out and buy one of those painfully kitch
smiling teddy bears with a heart between its paws, consider what you
are buying into, and what your love means to you. There are other
ways and many more days to show someone you love them, without
trivialising the concept.
As for tradition, and doing “the done thing”, fuck that for a joke. If you want to be a sheep, then go sit in a field for a bit. I think you'll find that these days, it's just not what it's cracked up to be.
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